Hi Everyone,
So I walk into the British Embassy in Bucharest. Usually at the gate you have to hand in your mobile phone, IPod, any other electrical equipment, have your bag searched, your hair combed for nits and your feet examined for any athlete's foot or veruccas. This time I'm waved through with a big smile from the two guards. The Head of Human Resources greets me, welcomes me to the Embassy and then takes me to the secure area of the Embassy (called the Chancery) where the Ambassador and I will be working.
The Ambassador is not there. The IT person working on one of the computers tells us he has just gone to the toilet. The HR boss leaves me and I wait. Sure enough two minutes later the Ambassador appears with his trousers over his arm saying:
"Hello Andrew. Welcome. I'll be with you in just a moment. Need to sort out my trousers first."
It wasn't the first words I was expecting to hear from my new boss but it certainly broke the ice!
(It was his spare pair of trousers which had been mended that was over his arm - he was wearing his suit. Sorry to spoil the scene!)
Actually apart from that meeting of about half and hour I did not seen him for two days. The Embassy have an extremely well organised induction programme. For those first two days I had a detailed programme saying who I was meeting, what they would be covering and at the end of it all what the result would be. Very professional and un-romanian!
The lady I have taken over from, Heather, sat with me for a week ensuring that I was fully briefed and that the handover was as comprehensive as it could be. It was quite a luxury having a week but somehow on my first day "on my own" I still managed to forget most of what she had told me and just about managed not to have a whole series of panic attacks. We only had two diplomatic incidents, with me offending the Ambassador of Kuwait and injuring the Greek Ambassador. I'm sure the surgeons have extracted the scissors from his leg by now.
Actually it is going very well. The Ambassador is a nice man and the others are great too, very supportive. We had Heather's farewell party at the Ambassador's residence and that really was just like the Ferrero Rocher advert, except the butler was bringing around smoked salmon on crackers, prawns on cocktail sticks etc rather than chocolates. I have met the Finnish and Egyptian Ambassadors this week. When they first take up their Ambassadorships they tour the Embassies meeting all their counterparts. By co-incidence both were ladies, so the male Ambassador stereotype is being broken. And for those of you familiar with Little Britain - yes I am Sebastian Love, the Prime Minister's Aide in that show.....
Me: "Mrs Ambassador, His Excellency is ready to see, you please go in"
I follow her in.
The UK Ambassador greets her.
"Lovely to meet you. Would you like a tea, coffee or water?" he asks.
"Water is just fine" she replies.
"Whatever" I say. "What did your last slave die of?"
Then I turn to the Ambassador:
"And can I fix you a lovely cold G&T with ice and a slice. I know how you love to sip one of those".
So work is going well. The social life is continuing its usual hectic pace. Last week I was out every evening. There was a private party at the French Ambassador's residence (completely separate from my job), a fashion show at the Hilton (Moet et Chandon flowing), the Next Models event (a competition to chose the best new model from Romania to go to the World finals, cheap champagne at this), a party at a place called Gaia Bar where there was a free vodka bar, another fashion show (with Veuve Cliquot champagne) and the opening of a new Chinese restaurant. The restaurant opening was great with a 9 course meal that began at 7.30pm and finished at 30 minutes past midnight when they had to pull down the front wall of the restaurant to enable the diners who now each weighed 500kgs to get out. It was beautiful food but if you ever go there do not have the spicy chicken wings unless you like to eat lava straight from the volcano. This was one of the hottest (as in spiciest) dishes I have ever experienced. Even Tibi had tears coming from his eyes and sweat running down his face!
However that was when my problem began. And it had nothing to do with the food. All that day I had been experiencing terrible toothache. While I did not relish going to the dentist here I realised that there was no way out of it. By the time I got home from the Chinese meal the side of my face had swollen up and it was clear that I had an infection. Tibi rang a friend of ours (Dana) who is a dentist and she recommended some antibiotics which Tibi got for me. She also recommended I get to a dentist. By the next morning my face was resembling the Elephant Man, children screamed when I went to the car and the beggars on the street gave me money patting me on the back sympathetically.
So I am rushed to the dental ER where we meet Dana. She is annoyed I have left it this long, claims I could have died of blood poisoning if the infection had burst in the night and took an x-ray of my mouth. They then rushed me to surgery area. There they cut my gum and drained out the pus. Unfortunately when there is a bad infection like that the anaesthetic isn't very effective. Well actually it is NOT EFFECTIVE at all!!! It hurt, HURT and HURT! But it did the trick. The dentist said the x-ray it showed I needed the tooth which caused the infection to be removed and another one also had to come out. He would do this in a week's time at his private clinic. This so far was on their "NHS" which is free (except we had to give some money to him through another route to make sure I was seen quickly - you know Romania).
Yesterday I went to the clinic at 5.30pm. It was lovely, sparkling clean and he and the assistants were great. He admitted that the anaesthetic they use in the "NHS" hospital is a bit weak and promised me this time I would feel nothing. And he was not wrong. Even when the two assistants stood on my chest while he got a hacksaw, a pair of pliers and some semtex because the teeth were proving a little reluctant to come out, I still felt nothing. Now of course my mouth is swollen, I have a continual ache in my jaw and I'm on a cocktail of pain killers/antibiotics. But he said the rest of teeth were great, so hopefully that is the end of it for some time. And being private I had to pay (officially not backhander) and it was about 90 pounds which was well worth it.
So for all these events I've been to and am going to next week with their free bars/champagne etc - I have been on antibiotics and couldn't touch a drop a drop. Torture!
Well I think I have gone on long enough now. Time to pop some more pills. Hope you are OK.
Take care
Andrew
Saturday, 6 December 2008
Thursday, 20 November 2008
Film Premiers, Romanian Oscars and communists.
Hi Everyone,
I am sorry to start with the weather, but it seems in the UK and Western Europe you have really had a cold windy wet time of it recently. It has been the complete opposite here in Romania. Until recently the temperatures have been way above average. The other evening I went to the local store in Piata Dorobanti at 11.30pm and the pavement cafes were full of people sitting outside. It has not rained here for weeks, in fact there have hardly been any cloudy days just blue skies and sunshine. However at night it is getting cold now with the clear skies. Out in the countryside here it went to minus 11c and was just above freezing last night in Bucharest. It did rain yesterday - only the 5th time it's rained since I arrived here on September 4th!
Life has been continuing as usual. I've been to the premier of the new Bond film Quantum of Solace in Bucharest, a choir singing in the beautiful Athenaeum building in the city, the 3rd Teacher's Whisky Film Festival and a Communist Party!
The Bond premier was a big affair. Not only was it the first showing of the film in Romania but it also was the opening of the first all digital cinema in Europe, in a new shopping mall here called the Liberty Centre. There was free food and drink, a show, a speech by the British Ambassador and of course the film. But by the time all the other stuff was finished the film did not start until 10.00pm. At exactly 11.00pm the film stopped. The screen went blank. We waited. Then waited a bit longer. Then they announced that the film was being streamed directly from the United States, but the permission to screen it finished at 11.00pm. They forgot about this when they organised the programme! So that was it, we all went home not knowing how the film ended!
I had never been into the Bucharest Athenaeum - one of the main buildings in the city, opposite the Winter Palace and the Hilton hotel. A choir Tibi used to sing with performed there this past weekend so we went to see them. The performance was very good but it was the building that was the star. It is extremely ornate and beautifully kept, a fantastic venue.
Another building I had never been into was the Sala Palatului, a 1960s construction behind the Winter Palace. It was where Ceaucescu did many of his key speeches. I was there for a Film Festival on their awards night. I am friends with the head and staff of a magazine/arts group called Tabu. They had entered a film in the festival and were nominated in 3 categories (best male actor, best supporting actress and best costumes). They won one of the categories - best costumes and of course we cheered, stomped, whistled and whooped when it was announced. I stole the award for a quick photo (attached) - it's the closest I will ever get to one!! I'm sure Ceaucescu would not have been impressed with the evening.
Speaking of Ceaucescu, I went to a birthday party with the theme of the good old Communist days! It was the 40th birthday of Cosmin, the husband of one of Romanian's top designers Silvia Serban. We wore the trade mark white shirts and red neck ties, with various communist badges, caps etc. Silvia has just passed her bartenders diploma, so there was a cocktail bar, but all the food was typical of the old days, which seemed to mean mainly bread and eggs! It was a great evening (photo attached) but once again I'm not sure Ceaceascu would have been pleased!
I know that every country has its bureaucracy, but I am coming up against some excellent examples of it here in Romania. If I want to stay in Romania longer than 3 months I need a temporary residence permit. I went on the website of the Administration for Aliens (what a great title for a Government Department - and yes here in Romania I am an alien!!). Their website gave me information on the documentation I needed, location of their office and opening times of the office. While the office is not far away it is only open from 10.00 - 12.00 on Wednesday mornings for these permit applications. But you can make an appointment, only 24 hours before your appointment. So on Tuesday morning I called them to make an appointment.
On the 7th attempt they actually answered the phone:
"Buna ziua" she said
"Buna ziua, vorbiti engleseste?" I asked
"Yes I speak English"
"Good, can I make an appointment to come in tomorrow for my temporary residence permit please?"
"No" she said "this is not the right office, you have the wrong number"
"But it's the number on the website" I protested
"Yes but it is wrong"
"Oh...........ok...........can I have the right number please?"
"You want the number for the permit office?" she asked sounding surprised!
"Yes please"
5 minutes later she gave me the number after she obviously struggled to find it.
On the 5th attempt with the new number I got through and they informed me that the website not only had the wrong number but the wrong address, wrong opening times and wrong information about necessary documentation! Two good things were that the office is closer to where I live and it is open every day from 8.30 - 12.30.....except Wednesdays of course!
And finally - I know this has been a long email but bear with me for 2 more minutes - I have a full time job!!! On Monday I start at the British Embassy as the Personal Assistant to the British Ambassador. So I really will be your man in Bucharest now, working to the Ambassador in the Embassy!
Of course I will let you know how I get on. I'm sure it will be very straightforward with no stories to relate!!
Take care
Andrew x
I am sorry to start with the weather, but it seems in the UK and Western Europe you have really had a cold windy wet time of it recently. It has been the complete opposite here in Romania. Until recently the temperatures have been way above average. The other evening I went to the local store in Piata Dorobanti at 11.30pm and the pavement cafes were full of people sitting outside. It has not rained here for weeks, in fact there have hardly been any cloudy days just blue skies and sunshine. However at night it is getting cold now with the clear skies. Out in the countryside here it went to minus 11c and was just above freezing last night in Bucharest. It did rain yesterday - only the 5th time it's rained since I arrived here on September 4th!
Life has been continuing as usual. I've been to the premier of the new Bond film Quantum of Solace in Bucharest, a choir singing in the beautiful Athenaeum building in the city, the 3rd Teacher's Whisky Film Festival and a Communist Party!
The Bond premier was a big affair. Not only was it the first showing of the film in Romania but it also was the opening of the first all digital cinema in Europe, in a new shopping mall here called the Liberty Centre. There was free food and drink, a show, a speech by the British Ambassador and of course the film. But by the time all the other stuff was finished the film did not start until 10.00pm. At exactly 11.00pm the film stopped. The screen went blank. We waited. Then waited a bit longer. Then they announced that the film was being streamed directly from the United States, but the permission to screen it finished at 11.00pm. They forgot about this when they organised the programme! So that was it, we all went home not knowing how the film ended!
I had never been into the Bucharest Athenaeum - one of the main buildings in the city, opposite the Winter Palace and the Hilton hotel. A choir Tibi used to sing with performed there this past weekend so we went to see them. The performance was very good but it was the building that was the star. It is extremely ornate and beautifully kept, a fantastic venue.
Another building I had never been into was the Sala Palatului, a 1960s construction behind the Winter Palace. It was where Ceaucescu did many of his key speeches. I was there for a Film Festival on their awards night. I am friends with the head and staff of a magazine/arts group called Tabu. They had entered a film in the festival and were nominated in 3 categories (best male actor, best supporting actress and best costumes). They won one of the categories - best costumes and of course we cheered, stomped, whistled and whooped when it was announced. I stole the award for a quick photo (attached) - it's the closest I will ever get to one!! I'm sure Ceaucescu would not have been impressed with the evening.
Speaking of Ceaucescu, I went to a birthday party with the theme of the good old Communist days! It was the 40th birthday of Cosmin, the husband of one of Romanian's top designers Silvia Serban. We wore the trade mark white shirts and red neck ties, with various communist badges, caps etc. Silvia has just passed her bartenders diploma, so there was a cocktail bar, but all the food was typical of the old days, which seemed to mean mainly bread and eggs! It was a great evening (photo attached) but once again I'm not sure Ceaceascu would have been pleased!
I know that every country has its bureaucracy, but I am coming up against some excellent examples of it here in Romania. If I want to stay in Romania longer than 3 months I need a temporary residence permit. I went on the website of the Administration for Aliens (what a great title for a Government Department - and yes here in Romania I am an alien!!). Their website gave me information on the documentation I needed, location of their office and opening times of the office. While the office is not far away it is only open from 10.00 - 12.00 on Wednesday mornings for these permit applications. But you can make an appointment, only 24 hours before your appointment. So on Tuesday morning I called them to make an appointment.
On the 7th attempt they actually answered the phone:
"Buna ziua" she said
"Buna ziua, vorbiti engleseste?" I asked
"Yes I speak English"
"Good, can I make an appointment to come in tomorrow for my temporary residence permit please?"
"No" she said "this is not the right office, you have the wrong number"
"But it's the number on the website" I protested
"Yes but it is wrong"
"Oh...........ok...........can I have the right number please?"
"You want the number for the permit office?" she asked sounding surprised!
"Yes please"
5 minutes later she gave me the number after she obviously struggled to find it.
On the 5th attempt with the new number I got through and they informed me that the website not only had the wrong number but the wrong address, wrong opening times and wrong information about necessary documentation! Two good things were that the office is closer to where I live and it is open every day from 8.30 - 12.30.....except Wednesdays of course!
And finally - I know this has been a long email but bear with me for 2 more minutes - I have a full time job!!! On Monday I start at the British Embassy as the Personal Assistant to the British Ambassador. So I really will be your man in Bucharest now, working to the Ambassador in the Embassy!
Of course I will let you know how I get on. I'm sure it will be very straightforward with no stories to relate!!
Take care
Andrew x
Wednesday, 29 October 2008
Halloween Fundraising Ball
Dear Everyone,
Just a quick note to let you see the Charity Halloween Ball I attended last Saturday. Those of you with good memories will recall that this is an annual event that I went to last year. There is always a theme - last year was the 1930's, but I had nothing suitable so I went as Merlin (long black robe and a white wig and beard). Well it is a Halloween Ball so a 'wizard' seemed a good idea. Unfortunately because Tiberiu went as an angel, everyone assumed I was God! Even one of the TV crews there interviewed me asking why God was attending this event!
This year the theme was Heros who have inspired you. Not a particularly easy one unless you want to go as Gandhi or Nadia Comeneci (she is Romania's most famous gymnast.) But I was limited by the availability of outfits at the fancy dress shop in Bucharest. I really wanted the Robin Hood outfit but it was far too big. After trying on various others, including Darth Vader, I found the Tutenkhamun outfit was the best. Not sure why a King of Egypt who came to the throne at 8 and died when 19 should be my hero but it was the only costume that fitted me! Tiberiu decided to go as a cave man - mainly because it showed off his legs that he considers his best asset! It was only on the way to the event that we came up with the idea that he was Conan the Barbarian. But we still could not think why he was a hero that inspires.
The event takes place at the People's Palace - the second largest building in the world and the huge monument left behind by Ceaucescue. It is a great setting and a fantastic occasion.
Tiberiu was interviewed 4 times (by TVR1, MTV Romania, Pro TV and Antenna 1), I was interviewed twice but thankfully they did not show those! And Tiberiu won the best Heroic Costume of the Event.
Attached are some of the TV news reports and newspaper articles from the event. In one of the TV reports it shows the auction that takes place during the evening - this year they had a bag donated by Demi Moore and a necklace from Gwyneth Paltrow. The organiser of the event and patron of the event is Leslie Hawkes, mother of the actor Ethan Hawkes.
I also attach a couple of photographs.
All the best
Andrew
http://stirileprotv.ro/bin/front.php?section_id=18&video_section_id=&media_id=60181609
http://www.mtv.ro/stiri/fashion/halloween-caritabil
http://www.mediafax.ro/poze/life-inedit/colierul-lui-gwyneth-paltrow-si-geanta-lui-demi-moore-impreuna-20-000-de-euro-galerie-foto.html?4728;3376374&type=attachments&ptr=5
http://www.cancan.ro/2008-10-27/CANCAN-30181.html
Just a quick note to let you see the Charity Halloween Ball I attended last Saturday. Those of you with good memories will recall that this is an annual event that I went to last year. There is always a theme - last year was the 1930's, but I had nothing suitable so I went as Merlin (long black robe and a white wig and beard). Well it is a Halloween Ball so a 'wizard' seemed a good idea. Unfortunately because Tiberiu went as an angel, everyone assumed I was God! Even one of the TV crews there interviewed me asking why God was attending this event!
This year the theme was Heros who have inspired you. Not a particularly easy one unless you want to go as Gandhi or Nadia Comeneci (she is Romania's most famous gymnast.) But I was limited by the availability of outfits at the fancy dress shop in Bucharest. I really wanted the Robin Hood outfit but it was far too big. After trying on various others, including Darth Vader, I found the Tutenkhamun outfit was the best. Not sure why a King of Egypt who came to the throne at 8 and died when 19 should be my hero but it was the only costume that fitted me! Tiberiu decided to go as a cave man - mainly because it showed off his legs that he considers his best asset! It was only on the way to the event that we came up with the idea that he was Conan the Barbarian. But we still could not think why he was a hero that inspires.
The event takes place at the People's Palace - the second largest building in the world and the huge monument left behind by Ceaucescue. It is a great setting and a fantastic occasion.
Tiberiu was interviewed 4 times (by TVR1, MTV Romania, Pro TV and Antenna 1), I was interviewed twice but thankfully they did not show those! And Tiberiu won the best Heroic Costume of the Event.
Attached are some of the TV news reports and newspaper articles from the event. In one of the TV reports it shows the auction that takes place during the evening - this year they had a bag donated by Demi Moore and a necklace from Gwyneth Paltrow. The organiser of the event and patron of the event is Leslie Hawkes, mother of the actor Ethan Hawkes.
I also attach a couple of photographs.
All the best
Andrew
http://stirileprotv.ro/bin/front.php?section_id=18&video_section_id=&media_id=60181609
http://www.mtv.ro/stiri/fashion/halloween-caritabil
http://www.mediafax.ro/poze/life-inedit/colierul-lui-gwyneth-paltrow-si-geanta-lui-demi-moore-impreuna-20-000-de-euro-galerie-foto.html?4728;3376374&type=attachments&ptr=5
http://www.cancan.ro/2008-10-27/CANCAN-30181.html
Tuesday, 14 October 2008
No News is...........boring!
Hi Everyone,
Sorry I've not been in touch recently but that's because nothing has happened! Well, that's not quite true. Absolutely nothing had happened on the work front. The British Embassy in Bucharest runs slower than a sloth watching paint dry while wading through black treacle in slow motion. They appear to be terribly disorganised and so that leaves me sitting here twiddling my fingers. I have however done some charity work. The teaching English to HIV+ children has not materialised yet but I have been involved in collecting and distributing goods to those children and their families. I took part in a presentation to Proctor and Gamble (Balkans). As a result we were given about 10 big boxes of their products - toothpaste, tooth brushes, soap, washing powder, ladies products (you know what I am talking about!) shampoos, pampers etc. I went with Michaela to give them to the children and their families who live in what only can be called a compound outside of Bucharest. The conditions really are awful and they were very grateful for the boxes.
Also I have not been in touch because the house has been in such a mess for the past month. There is a completely new bathroom going in and so for the past 3 weeks there has only been a bath tub and a toilet bowl (no cistern or anything like that, no wash hand basin etc). So to 'flush' the toilet you have to throw a bucket of water down there. Lovely. So for the last week I have been living with Alin and Roxana. They have a big house with plenty of space and a toilet that actually flushes which is a bonus.
The down side is that they have a 4 years old boy, Matei. To say his is spoilt is like saying that Hitler had one or two minor issues. He is used to getting his way, all the time. So if you go to watch TV he immediately wants the cartoon channel on or his cartoon dvds. So you decide to check your e-mails. He immediately wants to play his computer games etc. If he doesn't get his way he has a tantrum. Since he does not go to bed until 10.00pm at the earliest I'm sure you get the idea. How we laughed when I swung him around the room by his hair. In addition to this, he has not been well. Without any warning he decides to impersonate the Trevi Fountains in Rome with a multicoloured spray in all directions. Thankfully he is just physically sick and the the other end is not affected! It always seems to happen when he is sitting on the sofa. So when you sit on the couch there's a strange squelching sound and rather acidic whiff. I hope you can see why I have not been in touch recently!
Due the lack of news, let me give you a picture of modern Romania, through things that have appeared on the TV news recently or stories I have heard.
In the east of the country a man's cow went into a neighbour's garden and ate most of their flowers/plants. Now OK, I know that's not exactly up there with the 700 billion dollar package for the financial crisis in the USA. But the flowerless neighbour grabbed his pitchfork went next door and killed the cow's owner and left the wife in hospital on a life support machine. Seems a little excessive even for the famous Romanian "latin temperament"!
Tiberiu's mum lives in a village about 20kms outside of Bucharest. Every month her pension is delivered by the postman. That pension is the enormous sum of 70 euros a month. Not much at all, about 250 Romanian lei. For many years now she has been receiving 235 lei because the postman takes 15 lei as a "charge" for delivering this. And he does this for every pensioner in the village. We reckon there's at least 50 pensioners in the village so that's 750 lei a month he takes for "delivering" their pensions. That is 3 times Tibi's mother's pension! Once Tibi found out about this he arranged for it to be transferred directly into her bank account. Unfortunately many of the pensioners in the village don't have bank accounts. And there's no use telling the Post Office, they know it goes on!
To give you an idea how far that pension goes - Tibi's mum and step dad use wood and coal to heat their house and water, so in autumn they get all the coal and wood they think they will need. This year that cost them nearly 1,000 lei, that's 4 times her pension! But they are in luxury compared to others. In the very north of the country in an area called Maremures, they had on TV a pensioner who gets......wait for it........3 lei a week pension. That's 60 pence a week, not even 1 euro! There has been such a scandal that the government has promised to take action about it. Probably to double the pension!!
The final story regards the place where I have been staying, at Alin and Roxana's. Alin is the director of a complex for orphans who have left the orphanage system but are not ready to go out into society just yet. This place helps them to develop life skills to lead productive full lives (like killing people with pitchforks and stealing from pensioners). The complex covers a large area. One day they noticed some cranes on the edge of the place. So they went to have a look and they found that a company had fenced off an area of their land and was building on it. Despite contacting the police, city authorities, council etc, there is now a 10 floor SoftNet computer building there. Needless to say the police and city authorities have wallets that are as bulging as the local postman's.
And finally.....I've been on TV again! I went to the opening of the Radisson Hotel a couple of weeks ago and in a programme on TV about it there I was with a glass of Moet and Chandon in my hand looking all suave and sophisticated - as usual!!
Well I hope to have news about me working soon, but with the lovely weather we are having here, 23c and beautiful sunshine all day, I'm not complaining!
Take care
Andrew
Sorry I've not been in touch recently but that's because nothing has happened! Well, that's not quite true. Absolutely nothing had happened on the work front. The British Embassy in Bucharest runs slower than a sloth watching paint dry while wading through black treacle in slow motion. They appear to be terribly disorganised and so that leaves me sitting here twiddling my fingers. I have however done some charity work. The teaching English to HIV+ children has not materialised yet but I have been involved in collecting and distributing goods to those children and their families. I took part in a presentation to Proctor and Gamble (Balkans). As a result we were given about 10 big boxes of their products - toothpaste, tooth brushes, soap, washing powder, ladies products (you know what I am talking about!) shampoos, pampers etc. I went with Michaela to give them to the children and their families who live in what only can be called a compound outside of Bucharest. The conditions really are awful and they were very grateful for the boxes.
Also I have not been in touch because the house has been in such a mess for the past month. There is a completely new bathroom going in and so for the past 3 weeks there has only been a bath tub and a toilet bowl (no cistern or anything like that, no wash hand basin etc). So to 'flush' the toilet you have to throw a bucket of water down there. Lovely. So for the last week I have been living with Alin and Roxana. They have a big house with plenty of space and a toilet that actually flushes which is a bonus.
The down side is that they have a 4 years old boy, Matei. To say his is spoilt is like saying that Hitler had one or two minor issues. He is used to getting his way, all the time. So if you go to watch TV he immediately wants the cartoon channel on or his cartoon dvds. So you decide to check your e-mails. He immediately wants to play his computer games etc. If he doesn't get his way he has a tantrum. Since he does not go to bed until 10.00pm at the earliest I'm sure you get the idea. How we laughed when I swung him around the room by his hair. In addition to this, he has not been well. Without any warning he decides to impersonate the Trevi Fountains in Rome with a multicoloured spray in all directions. Thankfully he is just physically sick and the the other end is not affected! It always seems to happen when he is sitting on the sofa. So when you sit on the couch there's a strange squelching sound and rather acidic whiff. I hope you can see why I have not been in touch recently!
Due the lack of news, let me give you a picture of modern Romania, through things that have appeared on the TV news recently or stories I have heard.
In the east of the country a man's cow went into a neighbour's garden and ate most of their flowers/plants. Now OK, I know that's not exactly up there with the 700 billion dollar package for the financial crisis in the USA. But the flowerless neighbour grabbed his pitchfork went next door and killed the cow's owner and left the wife in hospital on a life support machine. Seems a little excessive even for the famous Romanian "latin temperament"!
Tiberiu's mum lives in a village about 20kms outside of Bucharest. Every month her pension is delivered by the postman. That pension is the enormous sum of 70 euros a month. Not much at all, about 250 Romanian lei. For many years now she has been receiving 235 lei because the postman takes 15 lei as a "charge" for delivering this. And he does this for every pensioner in the village. We reckon there's at least 50 pensioners in the village so that's 750 lei a month he takes for "delivering" their pensions. That is 3 times Tibi's mother's pension! Once Tibi found out about this he arranged for it to be transferred directly into her bank account. Unfortunately many of the pensioners in the village don't have bank accounts. And there's no use telling the Post Office, they know it goes on!
To give you an idea how far that pension goes - Tibi's mum and step dad use wood and coal to heat their house and water, so in autumn they get all the coal and wood they think they will need. This year that cost them nearly 1,000 lei, that's 4 times her pension! But they are in luxury compared to others. In the very north of the country in an area called Maremures, they had on TV a pensioner who gets......wait for it........3 lei a week pension. That's 60 pence a week, not even 1 euro! There has been such a scandal that the government has promised to take action about it. Probably to double the pension!!
The final story regards the place where I have been staying, at Alin and Roxana's. Alin is the director of a complex for orphans who have left the orphanage system but are not ready to go out into society just yet. This place helps them to develop life skills to lead productive full lives (like killing people with pitchforks and stealing from pensioners). The complex covers a large area. One day they noticed some cranes on the edge of the place. So they went to have a look and they found that a company had fenced off an area of their land and was building on it. Despite contacting the police, city authorities, council etc, there is now a 10 floor SoftNet computer building there. Needless to say the police and city authorities have wallets that are as bulging as the local postman's.
And finally.....I've been on TV again! I went to the opening of the Radisson Hotel a couple of weeks ago and in a programme on TV about it there I was with a glass of Moet and Chandon in my hand looking all suave and sophisticated - as usual!!
Well I hope to have news about me working soon, but with the lovely weather we are having here, 23c and beautiful sunshine all day, I'm not complaining!
Take care
Andrew
Friday, 19 September 2008
Rain, the Beckhams and a tattoo.
Hi Everyone,
Thanks for your e-mails. Great to hear from you.
So it's been just two weeks already here in Bucharest. And what a change!! Remember me arriving in 35c heat and constant sunshine - no more! Last night Bucharest had sleet......yes SLEET!!! In one day last week the temperature dropped from 28c to 15c and it hasn't stopped raining. Of course everyone blames me. "The British man has brought his British weather" they keep saying. Oh how we all laugh, especially when it is the 100th time you've heard it.
Don't worry, I am not going to bore you in this e-mail with details of events I've been to.........
Except to mention for the launching of a shop in the fashionable area of Bucharest called Dorobanti. When we left we each received a bag full of various beauty products.........
And just to quickly mention going to the launch of a new perfume called Zen. When we left we each received a bag containing a face cream, body lotion and a bottle of the perfume..........
Oh and quickly slip in the fact we went to the launch of David and Victoria Beckhams perfumes Signature. This event was a bit different because they had put a lot of effort into the evening. Everyone was asked to dress like David or Victoria Beckham. So I went in a short black dress and a short bob wig - only kidding! The Beckhams have had so many styles and reinventions that you could wear anything and it would have been ok. As you entered you had your photograph taken, then you had another one taken inside the launch and a third when you left. You also had the option of having a tattoo, since David is covered in them. So I got one on my forearm. It is a heart surrounded by thorns. As a leaving present we each received a bag with two bottles of their perfume.
Tomorrow I'm opening up my own cosmetic and perfume shop selling all this stuff they've given me!
On Saturday I went to a wedding, luckily for them it was the last nice day we've had. For those of you who have been to Bucharest the ceremony was in the Basilica Stavropoleos, one of the oldest churches in the city, almost opposite the restaurant Caru cu Bere. In fact the reception was in Caru cu Bere. The service was traditional with all the usual ceremony and ritual, including the bride and groom wearing crowns and at one point the married couple, their God parents and the priests all dance around the altar swinging incense!
The 'reception' was also the usual affair of drinking and eating, but in their unique way. The wedding ceremony was at 7.00pm and the party began about 8.30pm. The food was traditional with a plate of cold appetisers first (you know the sort of thing, stuffed lambs lungs, shavings from the cows hoof, cheese with texture and taste of Palmolive). Then came the potatoes and crap (carp in Romanian is crap) - they always have a fish dish second. Then came the sarmale (minced meat in cabbage leaves) with polenta. Unfortunately after the sarmale we had to leave because it was 2.30am and we were cream crackered. Also the 6 hours it had taken for us to get through 3 courses meant that the guests had also been drinking huge amounts of alcohol for 6 hours. At my table no-one seemed interested in the wine, they all liked the whiskey, so I had the bottle to myself......and some of the next table's wine too!!
Finally let me demonstrate to you one of the differences between the UK and Romania. As some of you will know, I have had some facial warts which have made me look like some cursed old witch from a Ronald Dahl book.
In the UK I made an appointment to see my doctor and had to wait 10 days for the appointment. When I saw him he said they would have to be frozen off, but this could not be done at the local surgery. I had to go to one in Oldham. So he contacted them. They sent me a letter asking me to call them to arrange a date. This all took 2 weeks. I called them and took the next free date available, in 6 weeks time. Unfortunately due to work commitments
I had to cancel that appointment and wait another 4 weeks for the next. Eventually the warts were frozen, but the doctor said I would have to return in 2 months time for another session.
Yesterday afternoon Tiberiu rang up the dermatologist for an appointment for me. This morning at 8.00am I turned up at the clinic, she looked at the warts, froze them, gave me 2 prescriptions for things that will help prevent them returning and said she'd see me in 7 days time to check all was OK.
Time from making appointment to see doctor to treatment:
UK - 3,960 hours
Romania - 19 hours
Wish things in Romania were not so unprofessional, inefficient and third world-like.
All the best
Andrew
PS the tattoo was a henna one of course, lasting only a couple of weeks at most!
Thanks for your e-mails. Great to hear from you.
So it's been just two weeks already here in Bucharest. And what a change!! Remember me arriving in 35c heat and constant sunshine - no more! Last night Bucharest had sleet......yes SLEET!!! In one day last week the temperature dropped from 28c to 15c and it hasn't stopped raining. Of course everyone blames me. "The British man has brought his British weather" they keep saying. Oh how we all laugh, especially when it is the 100th time you've heard it.
Don't worry, I am not going to bore you in this e-mail with details of events I've been to.........
Except to mention for the launching of a shop in the fashionable area of Bucharest called Dorobanti. When we left we each received a bag full of various beauty products.........
And just to quickly mention going to the launch of a new perfume called Zen. When we left we each received a bag containing a face cream, body lotion and a bottle of the perfume..........
Oh and quickly slip in the fact we went to the launch of David and Victoria Beckhams perfumes Signature. This event was a bit different because they had put a lot of effort into the evening. Everyone was asked to dress like David or Victoria Beckham. So I went in a short black dress and a short bob wig - only kidding! The Beckhams have had so many styles and reinventions that you could wear anything and it would have been ok. As you entered you had your photograph taken, then you had another one taken inside the launch and a third when you left. You also had the option of having a tattoo, since David is covered in them. So I got one on my forearm. It is a heart surrounded by thorns. As a leaving present we each received a bag with two bottles of their perfume.
Tomorrow I'm opening up my own cosmetic and perfume shop selling all this stuff they've given me!
On Saturday I went to a wedding, luckily for them it was the last nice day we've had. For those of you who have been to Bucharest the ceremony was in the Basilica Stavropoleos, one of the oldest churches in the city, almost opposite the restaurant Caru cu Bere. In fact the reception was in Caru cu Bere. The service was traditional with all the usual ceremony and ritual, including the bride and groom wearing crowns and at one point the married couple, their God parents and the priests all dance around the altar swinging incense!
The 'reception' was also the usual affair of drinking and eating, but in their unique way. The wedding ceremony was at 7.00pm and the party began about 8.30pm. The food was traditional with a plate of cold appetisers first (you know the sort of thing, stuffed lambs lungs, shavings from the cows hoof, cheese with texture and taste of Palmolive). Then came the potatoes and crap (carp in Romanian is crap) - they always have a fish dish second. Then came the sarmale (minced meat in cabbage leaves) with polenta. Unfortunately after the sarmale we had to leave because it was 2.30am and we were cream crackered. Also the 6 hours it had taken for us to get through 3 courses meant that the guests had also been drinking huge amounts of alcohol for 6 hours. At my table no-one seemed interested in the wine, they all liked the whiskey, so I had the bottle to myself......and some of the next table's wine too!!
Finally let me demonstrate to you one of the differences between the UK and Romania. As some of you will know, I have had some facial warts which have made me look like some cursed old witch from a Ronald Dahl book.
In the UK I made an appointment to see my doctor and had to wait 10 days for the appointment. When I saw him he said they would have to be frozen off, but this could not be done at the local surgery. I had to go to one in Oldham. So he contacted them. They sent me a letter asking me to call them to arrange a date. This all took 2 weeks. I called them and took the next free date available, in 6 weeks time. Unfortunately due to work commitments
I had to cancel that appointment and wait another 4 weeks for the next. Eventually the warts were frozen, but the doctor said I would have to return in 2 months time for another session.
Yesterday afternoon Tiberiu rang up the dermatologist for an appointment for me. This morning at 8.00am I turned up at the clinic, she looked at the warts, froze them, gave me 2 prescriptions for things that will help prevent them returning and said she'd see me in 7 days time to check all was OK.
Time from making appointment to see doctor to treatment:
UK - 3,960 hours
Romania - 19 hours
Wish things in Romania were not so unprofessional, inefficient and third world-like.
All the best
Andrew
PS the tattoo was a henna one of course, lasting only a couple of weeks at most!
Monday, 8 September 2008
Here we go again
Dear Everyone,
Well here I am back in Romania. I will be here until at least Christmas - I hope.
I arrived last Thursday, but not through my usual route (Manchester to Amsterdam, Amsterdam to Oslo, Oslo to Moscow, Moscow to Seoul, Seoul to Hydrabad, Hydrabad to Dubai and then Dubail Bucuresti) but this time I went direct from Luton. Yes Luton. And it was with Wizz Air, yes Wizz Air. Unfortunately the flight was at 7.55am so I had to stay overnight in Luton. Flying budget airline meant I was not going to spend a huge amount of money on a luxurious hotel, so I booked EasyHotel, yes EasyHotel. For 25 pounds I stayed in a windowless room with no wardrobes, cupboards or drawers and an orange pod in the corner of the room that was my shower/toilet/washbasin. Needless to say I could shower, shave and sh*t all at the same time! But it was exactly what I wanted for a few hours sleep and then be off on my travels.
Those of you who are familiar with my journals will know that I have a particular problem with Romanians travelling on airplanes. Nothing has changed. They still arrived with 23 pieces of hand baggage each - and were allowed on of course. That meant that security took 14 hours as each bag contained 20 litres of water, 1 tonne of creams and cosmetics and a kalashnikov. Each confiscation was greed with hysterical arguments, wailing and swearing. But eventually we got through to the departures gate.
Wizz Air operate a sit anywhere policy, so there is a mad rush to get to the front of the queue to board. I just happened to be by gate 20 when the Bucuresti flight was announced for gate 20! So I was second in the queue. Fantastic. Then they announced boarding would commence:
"People with mobility issues, families with small children and those who have paid for priority booking may now come forward to board".
Of course I was flattened in the stampede of able bodied, single Romanians with no priority boarding. The staff kept shouting that only those mentioned should come forward but the dam had broken. They were denied boarding, so guess what, they stayed where they stood i.e. IN FRONT OF ME!!! So I ended up boarding 396th and lying in one of the overhead luggage bins.
And my other pet dislike of the travelling Romanians, as soon as the plane touched down (after they had applauded), they are up out of their seats getting their luggage, switching their phones on and using them etc. Once again the cabin crew are screaming at them to sit down but evidently most Romanians have a severe hearing problem.
Finally I arrived in Bucuresti at about 14.00. Stepped outside into a wall of heat. As I will be here until Christmas I had brought winter clothes as well as lighter stuff, but of course being careful about the weight of my luggage (hold luggage was 22kgs and hand 14kgs so I was 6 kgs over but they didn't say anything) I was wearing a vest, T-shirt, shirt, jumper, fleece and coat, scarf and hat, thick trousers and books.......oh and a guttering system to take away the torrent of sweat.
By 18.00 I was standing in an air conditioned Perfumeria sipping Verve Clicquot champagne and eating blinis with red and black caviar on them. It was the opening of a new perfume house where the cheapest was 100 euros and it went up to 3,000 euros!! And guess what? The TV cameras were there and yes I've already appeared on TV when the news covered the opening of the boutique on their Sunday weekly round up. But that was not the end of it. By 20.00 that same day I was sipping Moet et Chandon champagne in the Throne Room of the Winter Palace at the launch of the Citroen C5 in Romanian. Just a normal day in Bucuresti!!
Things have calmed down and for Friday, Saturday and Sunday I just settled in and sorted things out. Although I did go to see Mamma Mia at the cinema at the weekend (they show all the films in their original language with Romanian subtitles) and enjoyed it immensely.
The weather here is abnormally warm. In fact I have not seen a cloud yet in the 5 days I have been here. Today is cooler at 34c (93f) - it was 37c (98f) yesterday!
Well that's about all for now. Hope you are all well.
Take care
Andrew x
Well here I am back in Romania. I will be here until at least Christmas - I hope.
I arrived last Thursday, but not through my usual route (Manchester to Amsterdam, Amsterdam to Oslo, Oslo to Moscow, Moscow to Seoul, Seoul to Hydrabad, Hydrabad to Dubai and then Dubail Bucuresti) but this time I went direct from Luton. Yes Luton. And it was with Wizz Air, yes Wizz Air. Unfortunately the flight was at 7.55am so I had to stay overnight in Luton. Flying budget airline meant I was not going to spend a huge amount of money on a luxurious hotel, so I booked EasyHotel, yes EasyHotel. For 25 pounds I stayed in a windowless room with no wardrobes, cupboards or drawers and an orange pod in the corner of the room that was my shower/toilet/washbasin. Needless to say I could shower, shave and sh*t all at the same time! But it was exactly what I wanted for a few hours sleep and then be off on my travels.
Those of you who are familiar with my journals will know that I have a particular problem with Romanians travelling on airplanes. Nothing has changed. They still arrived with 23 pieces of hand baggage each - and were allowed on of course. That meant that security took 14 hours as each bag contained 20 litres of water, 1 tonne of creams and cosmetics and a kalashnikov. Each confiscation was greed with hysterical arguments, wailing and swearing. But eventually we got through to the departures gate.
Wizz Air operate a sit anywhere policy, so there is a mad rush to get to the front of the queue to board. I just happened to be by gate 20 when the Bucuresti flight was announced for gate 20! So I was second in the queue. Fantastic. Then they announced boarding would commence:
"People with mobility issues, families with small children and those who have paid for priority booking may now come forward to board".
Of course I was flattened in the stampede of able bodied, single Romanians with no priority boarding. The staff kept shouting that only those mentioned should come forward but the dam had broken. They were denied boarding, so guess what, they stayed where they stood i.e. IN FRONT OF ME!!! So I ended up boarding 396th and lying in one of the overhead luggage bins.
And my other pet dislike of the travelling Romanians, as soon as the plane touched down (after they had applauded), they are up out of their seats getting their luggage, switching their phones on and using them etc. Once again the cabin crew are screaming at them to sit down but evidently most Romanians have a severe hearing problem.
Finally I arrived in Bucuresti at about 14.00. Stepped outside into a wall of heat. As I will be here until Christmas I had brought winter clothes as well as lighter stuff, but of course being careful about the weight of my luggage (hold luggage was 22kgs and hand 14kgs so I was 6 kgs over but they didn't say anything) I was wearing a vest, T-shirt, shirt, jumper, fleece and coat, scarf and hat, thick trousers and books.......oh and a guttering system to take away the torrent of sweat.
By 18.00 I was standing in an air conditioned Perfumeria sipping Verve Clicquot champagne and eating blinis with red and black caviar on them. It was the opening of a new perfume house where the cheapest was 100 euros and it went up to 3,000 euros!! And guess what? The TV cameras were there and yes I've already appeared on TV when the news covered the opening of the boutique on their Sunday weekly round up. But that was not the end of it. By 20.00 that same day I was sipping Moet et Chandon champagne in the Throne Room of the Winter Palace at the launch of the Citroen C5 in Romanian. Just a normal day in Bucuresti!!
Things have calmed down and for Friday, Saturday and Sunday I just settled in and sorted things out. Although I did go to see Mamma Mia at the cinema at the weekend (they show all the films in their original language with Romanian subtitles) and enjoyed it immensely.
The weather here is abnormally warm. In fact I have not seen a cloud yet in the 5 days I have been here. Today is cooler at 34c (93f) - it was 37c (98f) yesterday!
Well that's about all for now. Hope you are all well.
Take care
Andrew x
Thursday, 14 February 2008
The third week in Lithuania
Hi Everyone,
Sorry for the delay in getting this e-mail out to you. Unbelievably I am busy. This is something I am just not used to!
Last week was particularly busy because Peter and I ran two 2 day workshops. That may not sound much but when you are expecting about 12 or even up to 20 people and in the first workshop 44 people turn up, you need to make some adjustments! There were 31 in the second workshop.
It was funny to see the difference between the two groups. The first were all managers. Unethical behaviour is not a problem anymore in Lithuanian Customs. There is an open culture of learning from mistakes. The staff appreciate the controls in place that ensure they can demonstrate how there is virtually no corruption.
The second were all customs border staff. They said unethical behaviour was still a problem. There is a culture of blame and shame. The controls in place make them feel like criminals and guilty until they can prove themselves innocent.
Now Peter and I have to walk the tightrope between the two!
The workshops took place at the Customs training centre, a very well equipped building run by a woman as mad as a box of frogs. Utterly off her head bless her. Firstly she is quite short and wears glasses which are permanently crooked. Dear Alma has been blessed with a very ample bosom. Unfortunately gravity is taking its toll and they are now tucked into the elasticated waistband of her skirt. Alma doesn't really understand English well but knows a bit. In fact enough for her to finish off your every sentence for you. Except what she says is not what you were going to say. But she thought Peter and I were wonderful and so we think she is fantastic. Should be in a strait jacket, but a great woman.
Officially Lithuania is more dull and wet than the UK. Really in the two weeks I have been here there has been one day of sunshine. The rest of the time it is drizzly and grey. Except today when it has snowed all day. So while the UK has been in the 13 and 14c with clear skies and sunshine, it has been freezing here with snow.
And that's about it really. Not a classic installment I know but to be honest, Vilnius is a bit boring! None of the unpredictable chaos of Bucharest!
Until next time,
Andrew.
Sorry for the delay in getting this e-mail out to you. Unbelievably I am busy. This is something I am just not used to!
Last week was particularly busy because Peter and I ran two 2 day workshops. That may not sound much but when you are expecting about 12 or even up to 20 people and in the first workshop 44 people turn up, you need to make some adjustments! There were 31 in the second workshop.
It was funny to see the difference between the two groups. The first were all managers. Unethical behaviour is not a problem anymore in Lithuanian Customs. There is an open culture of learning from mistakes. The staff appreciate the controls in place that ensure they can demonstrate how there is virtually no corruption.
The second were all customs border staff. They said unethical behaviour was still a problem. There is a culture of blame and shame. The controls in place make them feel like criminals and guilty until they can prove themselves innocent.
Now Peter and I have to walk the tightrope between the two!
The workshops took place at the Customs training centre, a very well equipped building run by a woman as mad as a box of frogs. Utterly off her head bless her. Firstly she is quite short and wears glasses which are permanently crooked. Dear Alma has been blessed with a very ample bosom. Unfortunately gravity is taking its toll and they are now tucked into the elasticated waistband of her skirt. Alma doesn't really understand English well but knows a bit. In fact enough for her to finish off your every sentence for you. Except what she says is not what you were going to say. But she thought Peter and I were wonderful and so we think she is fantastic. Should be in a strait jacket, but a great woman.
Officially Lithuania is more dull and wet than the UK. Really in the two weeks I have been here there has been one day of sunshine. The rest of the time it is drizzly and grey. Except today when it has snowed all day. So while the UK has been in the 13 and 14c with clear skies and sunshine, it has been freezing here with snow.
And that's about it really. Not a classic installment I know but to be honest, Vilnius is a bit boring! None of the unpredictable chaos of Bucharest!
Until next time,
Andrew.
Tuesday, 29 January 2008
Lithuania calling!
Hi Everyone,
Just when you thought it was safe, I'm back. And this time its from a different country!
Yes I decided that anything Andy Thompson (AFT) could do I could do better. So I am in Vilnius, Lithuania for 3 months working with their Customs Authority. To be honest they obviously have been scarred by the experience with Andy but hopefully I can rebuild the relationship.
For some one who really is not comfortable flying, I seem to be continually criss crossing Europe at the moment. Naturally there are no direct flights from Manchester to Vilnius, so I went via Amsterdam Schipol with KLM. Well so I thought. The first leg was with KLM. Lovely big jet, 737-300 series for those who get excited at such detail. The two and a half hour flight from Amsterdam to Vilnius was with their "partner" airline LAL. Yes you have every right to ask who the * is LAL. Lithuanian Airlines of course. And it was a propellor plane the size of a milk float. The overhead luggage cabins had enough space for a briefcase, a coat, three newspapers and a minature bottle of whisky. After that it was completely full. A very overweight Lithuanian managed to occupy the back 3 rows of the plane and the other 4 of us crammed into the remaining space. It was a tiny plane.
Having said all that the flight was very smooth and no problems. Apart from collecting a few television ariels on the way and swerving to avoid a high rise block of flats, we had a straightforward flight. The stewardess was extremely pleasant for someone who had to be bent double the entire time. She only got annoyed when two people stood up at the same time to go to the toilet which sent the plane into a tail spin for a few minutes. But it all got sorted out.
I am staying at the Scania Hotel, which is very nice and has free wifi internet connection (hence the e-mail). Today was the first day with the Lithuanian Customs. Their building here is just around the corner and is luxorious compared to the wreck that housed the Romanian Customs Authority. And there is no group of sour faced deeply wrinkled people (thats what you look like if you smoke) sucking on cigarettes in the corridors of the office. In fact at the beginning of January Lithuania introduced a no smoking policy in all public buildings. It is heaven. So just like in the UK you can go for something to eat and drink without coming out smelling like an ashtray.
In addition, the city is so neat and tidy. Very clean. You can walk on the pavements without having to negotiate cars, wild dogs and beggars. So far I am very impressed with the place. I have managed to see quite a bit of the city because on the way to the restaurant tonight my colleague, Peter Kenton, and I get lost. So it took an hour to find the place. Then on the way home we thought we knew where we were going. And another hour later we found the hotel. But I am sure we will get our bearing eventually.
I was pleased for the walk because dinner had proved to be quite an experience. I ask myself one simple question - why do I listen to Andy Thompson (AFT)? He told me that a typical Lithuanian dish is translated as Zeppelins and I should try them. We went to a Lithuanian restaurant called Zemalciai and they had this dish so I ordered it. Two enormous (admittedly Zepplin shaped) things arrived on the plate. They were grated potatoes squashed back together again around a meat filling that was not a million miles away from a cheap sausage roll filling. This was then covered in some cottage cheese type goo and hard fried bits - bits of what I could not determine. I think if I had eaten a tub of Pollyfilla I would have felt more refreshed than consuming these weighty items. I struggled my way through most of it but could not finish off the last part. The waitress looked quite pleased and as she took it away she called to her friend that she could now block that hole that had appeared in garage wall.
So I had better get off to bed. I just hope it can take the weight of that potato dough in my stomach.
Take care and I'll see if I can dish up some more waffle and nonsense at the weekend.
Andrew.
Just when you thought it was safe, I'm back. And this time its from a different country!
Yes I decided that anything Andy Thompson (AFT) could do I could do better. So I am in Vilnius, Lithuania for 3 months working with their Customs Authority. To be honest they obviously have been scarred by the experience with Andy but hopefully I can rebuild the relationship.
For some one who really is not comfortable flying, I seem to be continually criss crossing Europe at the moment. Naturally there are no direct flights from Manchester to Vilnius, so I went via Amsterdam Schipol with KLM. Well so I thought. The first leg was with KLM. Lovely big jet, 737-300 series for those who get excited at such detail. The two and a half hour flight from Amsterdam to Vilnius was with their "partner" airline LAL. Yes you have every right to ask who the * is LAL. Lithuanian Airlines of course. And it was a propellor plane the size of a milk float. The overhead luggage cabins had enough space for a briefcase, a coat, three newspapers and a minature bottle of whisky. After that it was completely full. A very overweight Lithuanian managed to occupy the back 3 rows of the plane and the other 4 of us crammed into the remaining space. It was a tiny plane.
Having said all that the flight was very smooth and no problems. Apart from collecting a few television ariels on the way and swerving to avoid a high rise block of flats, we had a straightforward flight. The stewardess was extremely pleasant for someone who had to be bent double the entire time. She only got annoyed when two people stood up at the same time to go to the toilet which sent the plane into a tail spin for a few minutes. But it all got sorted out.
I am staying at the Scania Hotel, which is very nice and has free wifi internet connection (hence the e-mail). Today was the first day with the Lithuanian Customs. Their building here is just around the corner and is luxorious compared to the wreck that housed the Romanian Customs Authority. And there is no group of sour faced deeply wrinkled people (thats what you look like if you smoke) sucking on cigarettes in the corridors of the office. In fact at the beginning of January Lithuania introduced a no smoking policy in all public buildings. It is heaven. So just like in the UK you can go for something to eat and drink without coming out smelling like an ashtray.
In addition, the city is so neat and tidy. Very clean. You can walk on the pavements without having to negotiate cars, wild dogs and beggars. So far I am very impressed with the place. I have managed to see quite a bit of the city because on the way to the restaurant tonight my colleague, Peter Kenton, and I get lost. So it took an hour to find the place. Then on the way home we thought we knew where we were going. And another hour later we found the hotel. But I am sure we will get our bearing eventually.
I was pleased for the walk because dinner had proved to be quite an experience. I ask myself one simple question - why do I listen to Andy Thompson (AFT)? He told me that a typical Lithuanian dish is translated as Zeppelins and I should try them. We went to a Lithuanian restaurant called Zemalciai and they had this dish so I ordered it. Two enormous (admittedly Zepplin shaped) things arrived on the plate. They were grated potatoes squashed back together again around a meat filling that was not a million miles away from a cheap sausage roll filling. This was then covered in some cottage cheese type goo and hard fried bits - bits of what I could not determine. I think if I had eaten a tub of Pollyfilla I would have felt more refreshed than consuming these weighty items. I struggled my way through most of it but could not finish off the last part. The waitress looked quite pleased and as she took it away she called to her friend that she could now block that hole that had appeared in garage wall.
So I had better get off to bed. I just hope it can take the weight of that potato dough in my stomach.
Take care and I'll see if I can dish up some more waffle and nonsense at the weekend.
Andrew.
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